EST. 1968

I was born out of reconciliation. A yearlong issue between my parents. A simple phone call and miscommunication that took twelve months to settle.  They had turned 44 and already had five boys and one girl. When my mother missed her period, she thought it was menopause. Her gynaecologist thought the same too. Forty-four years – it had to be that time of her life. But she still asked for further tests and after what they called a toad test. She was pregnant. With me.

My mother always had difficult pregnancies, the first three months she was never able to hold food down.  So three months later, after my Dad had voiced his worries about their age, he was proudly packaging delicacies to be sent to the house by the company driver.

“She’s eating now,” he would say in delight to his colleagues.

I was born early, seven months because it was a high-risk pregnancy.  One can only thank God for His grace that both my mother and I survived.  That I survived without any health issues, that she came home with me safe, sound and ready for whatever purpose God had for both mother and daughter.

I remember many years later, finding telegrams and messages of good will that I understand were sent when I was born.  I was told, years later, that the day I was born, the telephone lines were jammed with calls from England, Birmingham and India.  My father at the peak of his career, as the first African General Manager of UAC was reaping his due rewards and respect. To the extent that even his wife having their last child was newsworthy.

I am teary as I write this, thinking of how there are times when I have felt little and unworthy and how the spiritual journey I have undertaken in the last few years has gradually brought back a sense of worth in God’s eyes, a sense of how loved and important I was to His world to come so late into my parents lives and survive.

Innocent eyes looking beyond

Into the future.

What did I see?

What was I thinking?

What did I know?

Was I preparing

For the twists and turns

Hills and Valleys

Mountains and Peaks

Of this journey called Life?

Did I know, honestly

What I would be?

Or not be?

See, I knew nothing

Nothing at all

But God knew

Even as I lay there 

In my ruffled diapers

On my milk filled belly

Looking into the future

With innocent eyes

He knew all

All there was to know

About me.

There was nothing

In my future

He couldn’t see.

And the fact is 

Without Him

I wouldn’t be.

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